- Family Member 1: There are guys who like My Little Pony. They're called Bronies.
- Family Member 2: What?! That's so messed up! There's something really wrong with them.
- *family sits down to watch South Park together*
My dad’s change of command ceremony was today, he passed command of the battalion over to the next lieutenant colonel. The ceremony was up on a hill and the wind was incredible and, during the ceremony, one of the marine’s hats blew off but he couldn’t do anything without breaking rank. Without a pause, my dad ran over in the middle, put the marine’s hat back on, and patted him on the back.
Despite the band, the speeches, the recognition, that was my favorite part and when I felt most proud of my dad. He takes care of his marines no matter how small the matter.
My car and I are actually really similar like we’re both gorgeous and classy on the outside but screwed up like crazy on the inside.
I can hear the Frozen soundtrack blaring from my brother’s room next door as he studies and I’m cracking up.
He’s a sixteen-year-old, 6’4” football player.
I have to watch Super Size Me for my Health/Fitness class. Hello again, dear old friend, childhood trauma.
My mom and I were watching the news and she was also looking at housing floor plans but when the President came on the TV she said, “That’s terrible. He’s an awful kitchen.”
“What makes a college student pull down [a statue of Lenin]? … What happened to Ukraine the last time the Russians took it? … [Stalin] killed between 6 and 8 million people in one year. Hitler wasn’t that efficient…. That’s why they did it. They know that the Soviet Union and Russia are a death machine.”
Nothing quite like coming down from the pre-SHIT THIS PAPER IS DUE IN AN HOUR adrenaline rush.
SHOOOT I WAS AT WORK WHEN TPP FINISHED
This is especially funny considering your url.