Story Time
Once upon a time a jackass came to my Sbux. He ordered a tall mocha BUT IT MUST BE 190 DEGREES because if IT’S TWO DEGREES TOO COOL HE’LL COME BACK. So this mischievous barista began to wonder and nodded along as she steamed the jackass drink and the jackass ranted how he didn’t care if he got stomach cancer, his mocha MUST BE 190 DEGREES. This barista politely informed the jackass that it was not so much the potential cancer that made some baristas not steam the mocha to 190 DEGREES but because at around 175 the milk expands, boils, and begins to explode. If it overflows, as it almost always does over 180 degrees, then it can cause serious injury to the barista.
The jackass stared, blinked, then continued his rant about not caring about stomach cancer, his mocha MUST BE 190 DEGREES.
The mischievous barista cut the temperature at 175, finished the mocha with generous stirring and whipped cream, and handed it over to the jackass with a smile. Feeling as if he’d won, the jackass took his mocha and drank half of it in the store before leaving.
Not once did he say a word.
Moral of the story: pretentious jackasses who knowingly order drinks that are dangerous to their preparer’s health genuinely can’t tell the difference. They just need to feel as if they’re getting their way. Don’t risk your health and safety for a jackass’s drink when he can’t tell the damn difference.
I had such a great weekend, didn’t have to worry about my parents at all because they went two states away, then they came home tonight. Within 15 minutes my mom is asking for my plans for the week, and my dad is talking about beating my dog for chewing door handles and then grilling me on my college plans. It’s 10:30 at night. You just drove 9 hours. And this is how you want to come home?
Dad: Remember that charity you drew a cartoon for? They have another job for you.
Me: Excellent, I love supporting charities run by good people that support our armed services, send it my way.
The job: “we need a logo for our group we’re aiming to get national support for this, please use guns to spell out the name. Also the Punisher skull.”
Me: *lies down and sobs silently*
So I had a customer try to convince me today that some Starbucks sell Pumpkin Spice Lattes year round.
????? What?????
We got our last shipment in December and I’m pretty sure it all expired in February. I tried to explain this to her and she argued with me that “SOME” Starbucks sell them year round, then she tries to lean around my register as if looking for it.
As if I was trying to keep it from her.
I’m going to lose my mind if I have to keep serving these kinds of people for much longer.
I should just make a Dragon Age blog at this point to spare you all.
2nd playthrough of Inquisition, trying to switch up my usual team (elf bf Solas, precious son Cole, and uncle Blackwall) but GOOD LORD NONE OF THEM GET ALONG. My usual team gets along but I put one other in (except Varric) and they do nothing but insult each other. Dorian wants common ground with Solas and asks about spirit servents???? Bull hits on Cassandra????? Vivienne hates everything I do?????? Sera calls Cole an “it”?????????
Everyone hates everyone.
Sbux Baristas–
We did it, guys and gals. We survived Happy Hour 2015.
god help me i forgot to rename my paper before i emailed to my professor
my 65 year old english professor is getting a document called “shit paper thing”
i have never written an apology email so quickly
Proposal:
Support group for everyone dreading Mother’s Day because their relationship with their mother is tenuous and mistrustful.
