Basically how to fuck over the smart person in the group.

This is from a website my communications class professor linked me to.

• Mom: When you're old and jaded like me, you'll understand.
• Me: I'm twenty-one and I'm already jaded.

Liquid eyeliner is the most accurate predictor of how my day is going to go.

I can’t decide if it’s worse having friends or not having friends.

OMG I JUST FELT MY FIRST EARTHQUAKE NOT OKAY NOT OKAY NOPE.

5.4 QUAKE IN LA HABRA, CA, FOLLOWING A 3.6 AN HOUR AGO. NNNNNNNOPE.

OKAY READY TO LEAVE CALIFORNIA FOREVER.

It’s boggling to me that the Obamacare law says that insurance companies can’t kick kids off their parents’ insurance plans until they turn 26, UNLESS you have Tricare, the government’s insurance plan for the military.  With Tricare, child dependents get excluded from the program as soon as they turn 21, unless they are full-time students and then the plan is extended to 23.

So the law is applied to all insurance companies, EXCEPT THEIR OWN.  That should be something fishy right there.

So I watched Frozen with a friend and she didn’t know anything about it, like actually NOTHING, and no joke twenty minutes in she asked me, “Hans is evil, isn’t he?”

she called in during Love is an Open Door.  she called it that early.

A part of me really wants to go back and try to rewatch InuYasha for the nostalgia kick, but a part of me really doesn’t want to relive those awkward middle school memories.

• Family Member 1: There are guys who like My Little Pony. They're called Bronies.
• Family Member 2: What?! That's so messed up! There's something really wrong with them.
• *family sits down to watch South Park together*

My dad’s change of command ceremony was today, he passed command of the battalion over to the next lieutenant colonel.  The ceremony was up on a hill and the wind was incredible and, during the ceremony, one of the marine’s hats blew off but he couldn’t do anything without breaking rank.  Without a pause, my dad ran over in the middle, put the marine’s hat back on, and patted him on the back.

Despite the band, the speeches, the recognition, that was my favorite part and when I felt most proud of my dad.  He takes care of his marines no matter how small the matter.