Red flag: “No one but me is allowed to touch you.”
Totally cool: “It makes me feel weird when you flirt with other people, can we talk about that?”
Red flag: “If you loved me, you would stop being friends with them. You KNOW it makes me jealous.”
Totally cool: “I hope we’re together forever. I’m so in this for the long haul.”
Red flag: “If you ever left me, I would kill myself.”
Totally cool: “Your mom is really unkind to me, can we try to minimize how often you bring me when you visit her?”
Red flag: “Your mom hates me, you need to stop talking to her. She’s trying to ruin our relationship.”
Totally cool: “I love you so much, oh my god.”
Red flag: “It’s a good thing I love you so much, because no one else would. You’d be alone forever without me.”
Other important red flags to keep in mind: someone who wants to jump into emotional/financial co-dependence very fast (like moving in together right away, or becoming each other’s only confidantes right away) and won’t take no for an answer; someone who tries to minimize how often you leave the house or interact with other people; someone who threatens you or themselves or your family or pets or possessions or financial future; someone who uses guilt to keep you from leaving a relationship.
Very important reminder: You do not need a reason to leave a relationship. Neither does the other person (or people). A relationship is over when one of the people in it says it’s over, period. Obviously it’s kind to take the end of a long relationship seriously, but abusers and manipulators have lost the right to that conversation. Lie if you need to–your safety is much more important than their feelings.
Trust your instincts!
>>> Has to write an essay, wants to do art homework.
>>> Has to do art homework, wants to write essay.
So I had a customer try to convince me today that some Starbucks sell Pumpkin Spice Lattes year round.
????? What?????
We got our last shipment in December and I’m pretty sure it all expired in February. I tried to explain this to her and she argued with me that “SOME” Starbucks sell them year round, then she tries to lean around my register as if looking for it.
As if I was trying to keep it from her.
I’m going to lose my mind if I have to keep serving these kinds of people for much longer.
I am the conductor of the Screw Up Express today. Pray I don’t end up at a station near you.
